This past weekend Jaime and I celebrated our 6th year of marriage. As I reflect on the past couple of years so much has happened and it already feels like a lifetime ago since the day we said I do. It isn’t or wasn’t always smooth sailing and together we have experienced both great and trying times. I am grateful that our love continues to stand the test of times. I am even more so grateful to God for His blessings and grace as our family grows! Thank you to everyone that poured out love to us!!!
As of late I find myself thinking about the future/destiny/life purpose. Many people are asking me when will I have more children. As of right now to be honest ladies I don’t know about that. Granted if the Lord says more then I humbly and gratefully accept however these days I feel an urgency to give birth to and nurture my passion.
A few weeks ago, some of the ladies from our Wives Unite group had a discussion about why getting married is acknowledged as an achievement over the pursuit of academic and entrepeneural advancements of women. That discussion got me thinking. In our world there seem to be a split where we take sides on women’s roles based on what we believe. We either honor the wives and moms who are stay at home or we honor wives and moms that work full-time jobs. Sometimes it seems as though you can’t meet in the middle. In reality, women on both sides of the spectrum may develop feelings of guilt, shame, depression, a loss sense of self, fear and a host of other feelings because we may all desire to commit wholeheartedly to being the ultimate homemaker and equally pursue personal advancements in other areas.
Being that I was afforded the privilege to live on both sides, I have sometimes felt torn and even guilty about desiring the other side. This brings me to thoughts of what the whole woman looks like today in 2016. We are the homemakers and we are also the go getters that have goals and dreams outside the home.
AND you know what???
That is OK! There is no need to allow guilt to overtake you. It ‘s ok to be whoever you want to be. You want to be at home raising and taking care of your family? YESS do that!! You want to be a career woman? YESS do that! You want to do both? YEEEESSSS you can do it too! You don’t have to choose one over the other. Go for it!
I say this because I have learned that you will not be as satisfied or happy in life if you wake up one morning feeling like you didn’t pursue the dreams you once had. In all actuality you may just wake up also feeling bitter and resentful towards yourself and possibly your husband. We do make many sacrifices in our lives for the sake of our families but have you ever considered that you could have avoided sacrificing your dreams. Yes it may not be easy to pursue those dreams but isn’t it at leasts worth it to say that you tried. Perseverance and patience will often bring success but a quick fix, an easy way out or habitual excuses will lead to road blocks and dead ends.
Jaime and I had a heart to heart about this. In our new year we want to continue to grow in love as well as make sure that we both do some self-assessment about where we are as individual people. We decided to do this because we want to not only build family unity but we also find it important to not loose sight of the individual dreams that we once had. We recognize that our dreams are important and pursuing them can only enhance our family. In doing this, we vow to be each other’s biggest supporters which in turn will make us an even better team.
Having a heart to heart with your husband can be so helpful! I encourage all of you rediscover your hidden dreams!
No matter what they are on either side of the spectrum, be proud about it and find a way to make it happen. There is no time like the present!
Share with us! what are some of your dreams and aspirations?